England’s World Cup fate decided by German octopus

UGLY SEA CREATURE NEWS

England’s World Cup fate decided by German octopus

Obviously, it went for them. FIX!

octofix.jpg

The England squad might want to save some time and start getting their bags packed this afternoon, because a psychic octopus called Paul has predicted Germany will triumph in Bloemfontein.

Paul’s clairvoyance skills are put to the test before each of Die Mannschaft’s big football clashes, and his carers at the Sea Life Aquarium in Oberhausen are proudly boasting of an 100% success rate for all of the country’s World Cup games so far.

Maybe The Spoiler should get him in to do our betting tips.

The winners are chosen depending on which of two glass tanks the ugly mollusk decides to eat a tasty mussel from when presented with the choice. Earlier this morning, when given the option of the Bundesflagge or St. George’s Cross, Paul plumped for the former. Was für eine Überraschung!

The worst part of it* is that Paul was actually born in England, before emigrating to Germany. First pigeons, then baboons now octopuses. The animal world is slowly turning against England.

*Actually, the worst part of it is he predicted 80% (that’s eighty percent) of Germany’s results in Euro 2008 correctly :(

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